CHENEY HUNTING ACCIDENT! Ballistic Science Reveals Truth!

This is not satire.....it is as real and substantial as a large, cold, dead turkey riddled with number 7 1/2 shot pellets from a 28 gauge shotgun.

No, I repeat, this is NOT satire. We should have known this would happen.

Tests have been done to verify the effectiveness of the 28 Gauge Shotgun at various distances. Chickens, pigs, turkeys and melons are being shot full of holes by Liberals and Conservatives alike (no chicken hawks were shot in these tests).

Still, the metaphors suggested by the targets are most intriguing.

The First Test proves the Conservatives are right (and shows that Conservatives are also FAR more creative in target choice).

The Second Test proves the Conservatives are right and that the Liberals don't know much about guns, but DO know how to use smoke and mirrors (and are far less gifted in choosing symbolic targets).

Neither group used the more powerful hunting loads that I mentioned in the post below (in fact, the Liberal group must have used very special and impotent ammunition as they could not get it to penetrate wallpaper at 30 yards, thus "proving" that Cheney's gun could not even put out the eye of a baby robin at that distance).

BTW, all my conclusions below are based on my many years of experience in hunting with shotguns of ALL gauges and backed by several books on shotgun ballistics, the foremost of which is "The Shotgun Book" by Jack O'Connor.

No animals were harmed in my efforts, but my conclusions are validated by the tests done by the more creative group (they actually punched a fist sized hole through a watermelon at ten yards even without using the heavy Winchester Super-X load that I mentioned in my post below).

This more exhaustive and thorough testing (which also included totally demolishing a cornish game hen at five yards and ripping a huge hole in a turkey at five yards) ended with the conclusion that Whittington was probably shot at a distance of 20 to 30 yards (exactly what I had concluded).

Maybe some still have doubts as to how pellets ended up in Whittington's heart and liver. Here's an interesting tidbit: The doctors said that the pellet they saw in his heart was larger than the rest--they called it the size of a number four shot instead of 7 1/2 shot. Or they called it the size of four size 7 1/2 shot.....the account is not clear and people have such difficulty with ammunition terminology.

But is this puzzling? No. Shotgun pellets can clump together and actually adhere to one another. That is not uncommon and happens in the manufacturing process. Such clumps would penetrate much deeper than the other pellets. These things usually are not noticed by hunters (unless they "pepper" a partner).

Odd things happen with ballistics, but very few are puzzling with the proper investigation.

I rest my case. NOW can we leave Cheney's unfortunate accident and get on to more important things?